Chapter 6

His suit

Hung neatly on the back of the closet door. Pressed with shirt and tie.

It was a reminder; it was like a clock saying time was up.

The re-appointed head of ELQ was now down on his knees.

His head pressed against her, his arms wrapped tightly around her waist as she sat at the edge of the bed.

Crucial moment, stay or go

Her hand cupped the back of his head trying to comfort.

He wanted her to beg him to stay; she wanted him to say he wouldnt leave her, that he wouldnt leave hernow

You should get dressed, youre plane

She said trying to be reasonable knowing he had his job, he had his life

Why is this so hard? I can come right back.

Maybe its a sign, ELQ needs you more than me She said as she smiled shyly

His face didnt change from the look of anguish

Heythen just come back, isnt it that simple? She said assuringly

He looked at her brown eyes and her stunning lightly freckled face. He couldnt resist her. Nothing in the world made him resist her.

Go with me

What? Ned I cant! No! She said reacting quickly

Alexis its Port Charles You can see Jax, he misses you and

Ned I cant

What are you afraid of? Sonny?

Im not afraid of Sonny, why would I be? She said noticeably agitated that Ned had made the comment.

Alexis everyone thinks Im Isabellas father, he knows nothing. Everyone also know that you and I are on good terms, if they see you with me its ok

She calmed herself. She couldnt live in fear of a man who knew nothing, it was her secret and it was Neds secret.

Promise me

She was serious

I promise you Everything will be fine and then well come back

The lump in her throat was suffocating

Ok

Her hands shook slightly

Suitcase in the spare bedroom closet

Suits, her suits all lined up perfectly in the closet. She hardly ever wore them anymore. She was more relaxed now, no need for a suit.

A black sweater faded jeans. She wanted to give no illusions to the life she was living so she decided to go as isshe wanted to show the new Alexis Davis.

A million things, babies need a million things.

Isabella sat comfortably in her carryall as her mommy packed diapers, and bottles and little lambs.

We need to leave in 15 minutes

I think Im ready, she said looking around What? She said smiling

He was watching her

Thank you

For?

For going with me. For letting everyone see how amazing you are

How amazing huh?

Youre right I take that back, extraordinary

She cupped the sides of his face and gave him a soft kiss that he knew only she could give

Wrapped neatly from the cool air, Isabella didnt seem disturbed as Ned and Alexis boarded the ELQ jet.

He held her hand.

Fingers intertwined; at times she seemed to be gripping his hand tightly.

He knew she was unsure of going back to Port Charles. This was not a woman who was afraid. The life she had lived wouldnt allow her to be afraid over almost something so simple as to show her face But she was unsure of showing Isabellas face.

Dark eyes

A Cassadine, a Corinthos She was the spitting image of Alexis and no one could really argue that her huge brown eyes were not a symbol of her mother, which would lead no trace to her father.

Alexis watched the two of them, it was her calm, it made her feel sane.

A ritual

Ned held her as she drifted in and out on consciousness. It had suddenly become their ritual that he would put her to sleep, that he would hold her in his arms until she closed her eyes tight.

Mommy in the morning daddy at night

See Ellas not worried about her debut Ned said as he watched her eyelids flutter

Alexis pressed her forehead against the temple of his head

It will be good to see Jax, she said in an almost whisper to assure herself

She had never seemed so unsure but he would take care of she and Isabella in every way he could

He promised her that



Chapter Seven

I knew sooner or later you would miss me enough to come back he said as his blue eyes sparkled at the sight of her

Alexis eyes widened

She ran quickly into his arms

He held her in an embrace, there in the living room of the gatehouse.

He was tall and his arms seemed as if they would almost double around her, the way her held her so tight.

She didnt mind. She held him with her arms wrapped around his neck. Taking in the way it felt to be back in his arms

She missed him; he was her best friend

You look wonderful! Motherhood or is it the beach life? Jax said grinning

Alexis only responded with a grin

Isabella! Jax said looking over Alexis shoulder to see the face of perfection

Alexis held her up for Jax to hold her.

He at first wasnt sure if he would hold her right but she seemed content and mesmerized looking up at the funny haired Aussi.

Shes perfect

Well I think so

No Alexis, shes perfect

Alexis widened her grin

Here sit with me, she said pointing he and Isabella to the couch Do you want me to take her?

No way we have some catching up to do

Isabella seemed to know him, her mothers confidant

So how are you? Are you ok?

Oh just up to my usual

And Skye?

Well shes up to her usual, he said shaking his head

Youve really fallen in love with her havent you?

Shes really good for me

I know

Speaking of falling in loveagain

Hes really good for me

I know

She let out a shy laugh

So how long are you staying?

You assume Im not?

I know youre not

The conversation turned a shade of gray

Jax, a knight in shining armor, a man that would do anything to right a wrong, a man that would do anything for his best friend even understanding a not so good situation involving someone perfect.

Do you know everything? Does everyone know everything?

She had a very concerned face

I know, because I know you, because I know Ned. Because he would do anything for you

Even be the father of my child? She said sheepishly

Even if hes not

Her first reaction was to beg that he keep quiet

She wouldnt beg, he would keep her secret as long as she would

I couldnt tell him she was his

Him was implied

Jax of course knew who he was

You did what you had to do, Alexis you did what was best for her

I know I did and he can never know

Her eyes screamed of pain

So did you ever finish the case you were working on a month ago?

He changed the subject

She cleared her throat

Uh yeah I did

Another one for the books?

Of course She said as she grinned shyly trying not to be visibly shaken

Hey

Alexis attention went to him

Youre secret is safe with me, you know that

Alexis shook her head (she did know)

The door swung open and Ned appeared into the living room

Ah I should have known I would catch the two of you Ned said grinning

Im trying to persuade her to run away with me

Alexis rolled her eyes

Isabella began to fuss

Looks like she wants her daddy Jax said first looking at Alexis and then handing her to Neds already reaching arms

The word daddy, he never skipped a beat

Alexis heart did

Jax stood up

Breakfast tomorrow?

Yes She said without hesitation

He kissed her, said his good-byes with one last look to Isabella Shes perfect I tell you

The door closed behind him

Alexis kissed her babies head as she lie in her daddys arms

How are you? He said analyzing the look on her face

Im ok

Her fake smile

Shes tired let me put her down

Alexis grabbed the sides of his face kissing him

What was that for?

For me

He smiled and took Isabella upstairs to her awaiting bassinet

Isabella had made herself at home.

Alexis picked up her things and gathered them into her arms before heading upstairs



She sat down on the edge of the bed

Chills ran down her spine from every kiss

His lips ran across her shoulders

He had become the calm of the storm, he promised

What is it baby?

Tense shoulders

Jax knows

It was haunting her

I figured he did

His arms tightly around her. he couldnt feel her breathe

He stood up from the bed, leaving her there without question

Her face rested in the palms of her hands

Dreadful worry

Her angel appeared, he was standing in the doorway with her angel

Safe and sound

Isabella, not a worry in the world

In her mothers arms

The sounds of her breath filled the room

Alexis could breathe again

She didnt sleep and Isabella never left her arms

She paced, she rocked, she sat, she stared

She didnt sleep.



Chapter Eight


Eggs toast. She was on her second cup of coffee

Bouts of laughter

A great disguise

No trace of the night before, no trace that she was fighting against her greatest battle, herself.

She looked vibrant and happy, untroubled, worry free

Isabella slept

She sat in her carryall in the seat beside her mother, she decided a nap would be best, mommy was ok, she was with Jax.

Wheres Ned this morning?

ELQ of course

Good! I have you all to myself!

He didnt mention Sonny. As if Jax had learned his lesson very quickly about even saying his name.

She had made it through breakfast, she wanted to sigh in relief, Jax wanted to sigh in relief.

It wasnt that their time together was uneasy but there was an underlying worry that Sonny would just waltz right in it was a public place

She didnt get to make her sigh

There he was standing there perfect timing

Jax caught his eye; he tried to look away before Alexis noticed his change in expression

What? she said looking at him

Nothing he answered quickly

Her head turned but she didnt turn her head back to hide

Boldness

He caught her

She was suddenly alone

Everyone blurred, voices echoed, china clattered

Seeing him, she had feelings for him.

And all the times she wanted to wish him off the face of the earth, all the times she wanted Isabella to never know he existed. Seeing him, she suddenly wanted to shout across the room THANK YOU, Ive made myself hate you, but THANK YOU FOR ISABELLA! THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME MY HEART!

She turned her head back

Jax couldnt stop him

His hand leaned on to her shoulder, but she composed herself.

Alexis what are you doing here? He said obviously surprised to see her

She turned to look at him

She felt helpless and naked, defenseless; she would show no fear

Visiting

Visiting?

Ned, I came back, Ned had meetings at ELQ

Mentioning Ned, she felt saved, the excuse was good enough

This is Isabella?

He had already bent down to see her

Alexis had stopped breathing minutes ago

Yeah She said clearing her throat

Her eyes were closed, he couldnt see her dark eyes, eyes that she knew he would recognize. Eyes that partly stared back at him in the mirror

Jax watched as Alexis began to fidget

Isnt she already the spitting image of Alexis?

Watching Alexis drown, he tried to help her swim

Yeah she is

The way he smiled. Was it the way she smiled?

Alexis mind raced to compare their faces

Shes beautiful, like her mother He said in his usual charming way Alexis you look great

Sincerity

Thank you a simple smile

He took in the sight of her for a moment. It could have been minutes, it could have been only seconds she got lost

She let him

Chemistry defined as a spark between two people.

The inability to resist

You really do look wonderful. You look happy

I really am

Uh hows Ned?

He good, really good

Well I should let you get to your breakfast

Uh yeah

Im really happy youre doing so well

He couldnt let go of the conversation she couldnt either

He wanted to tell her a thousand things; she wanted to hear his every word

Friends, lovers, no longer friends

Youre little girl is beautiful

Her little girl, his little girl

He suddenly leaned in and kissed her on the cheek

Her heart pounded

It was good seeing you

Yeah you too

A last look, a look that could have been mistaken for needed, someone wanted

He walked away

She let him



Chapter Nine

She didnt wear silk pajamas anymore

She had inadvertently said one night that they made her feel like the person she use to be, she didnt like that person very much anymore.

His T-shirt

It was heather gray, he had worn it a thousand times and she would wear it a thousand more

He liked the T-shirt better, it was favorable to her legs

Are you ok?

Im fine

You look tired

I am, long day I guess

How was your breakfast with Jax?

Jax, Jax, Jax her mind tried to focus on the question

It was good

Are you sure everythings fine?

Would you stop! Im just spaced out I think Im going to bed

Ok

He would leave it alone. She needed breathing room

Isabella was already in Neds arms, ready for their ritual

Alexis pulled the comforter up to her chest leaving the two of them

And she had pulled it off.

Unnoticeably she had withdrawn herself again

Isabella gripped the material of his pocket on his T-shirt tightly.

Ned was her security blanket.

They had talked about the day, she had been fed, he had sung their song and he laid the sleeping beauty to rest unknowing that was the day her father had met her for the first time.

Ned slipped in bed beside Alexis trying not to wake her. She seemed to want to rid herself of the day so he was sure not to interrupt her sleep.



She was a little girl.

Her dark hair and lightly freckled face told the secrets to whom she belonged. Her arms open wide, she was spinning around and around, suddenly a blur, she fell to the ground.

But she laughed, laughed at the blue sky turning round and the fuzzy shape of the clouds.

Her brother fell to the ground beside her also in a dizzy haze, which only prolonged her giggles.

Gunshots, it seemed like thousands, one after the other of crackling gunshots.
She was spinning around and around, suddenly a blur, she fell to the ground.

The dark sky turning round and the fuzzy shaped clouds.

He fell to the ground beside her. He was covered in blood.

No laughter, instead of screams or the sound of her own voice screaming Sonnys name, suddenly all she could hear was the sounds of Isabella crying

Her cries became louder and louder but she couldnt find Isabella to comfort her, to hold her

Her body jolted and her eyes opened into the dark room.

Shes crying! Alexis said as if she were still searching for where Isabella was

Shes ok, Ill get her Ned said as he went into the other room to check on Isabella

Alexis dug her palms into eyes

See mommy were ok

Alexis looked at Isabella almost as if she were finding it hard to place herself back into reality, no bloodstains, and no harm
Ned got back into bed

I think she just needed to know we were still here

He wrapped his arms around Alexis

Still not noticing she was slowly driving her own self-crazy

He fell fast asleep


Sunlight, thank God

Her eyes were open as the sun began to creep through the window

She tried to ease her way out of bed

Escape plan

She went to check on Isabella, who amazingly still slept

She would put on her jeans again and this time a light blue sweater that hugged her neck and body

She needed the comfort

Her hair pulled up and her freckles shining brightly through only the hint of make-up she had took the time to put on

Her eye caught the gray T-shirt on the floor. She hesitated then shoved it into her bag

She lifted up Isabella trying not to wake her and sat her in her carryall, snuggled with blankets

A note on his dresser, it would be easy for him to find

The note that said she had unnoticeably withdrawn herself again and then apologized

She bit her bottom lip.

Wanting to explain that she was running from herself not him

She was gone



Chapter 10

His Grandfather

Edward Quartermane had no sympathy when it came to Neds love life. He said that woman made a mockery of him and that she made him vulnerable and at times witless

She did

Edward would call personally to the gatehouse to see where Ned was

He hadnt been to ELQ in days

He hadnt left the gatehouse in days

He was a man missing

A man missing the love of his life

A man that couldnt let go of a woman that at times made him witless

She also made him laugh and love

She made him if anything feel

The note

The edges were now crumples were he held it in his hand, he had read it a thousand times.

Perfect wording, perfect sentence structure, perfect punctuation.

It was her

Everything about the letter was her. Especially the part when she explained why she had to leave

She had become good at that, leaving

You think he would have learned by now

Instead a scruffy faced man had made a mockery of himself once again, because of her

The picture he held in his hand was taken the first time he saw Isabella smile. Ned insisted he have that moment captured though she had smiled a thousand times before

But almost in a strange manner he wasnt staring at the Isabellas smile he had already memorized it to perfection

Instead his eyes glared, and his fingers paced over the tear shaped diamond that she wore around her neck in that picture

The way it fell against her chest, the way it sparkled

He couldnt take his eyes off of it

He had made love to her one night in her suite at The Port Charles Hotel and he had put that necklace around her neck

At the time it was the only thing she was wearing and she would tease him as she dangled over his body

A knock at the door broke his concentration

Ned had no intentions of entertaining whomever was at the door

Another knock

Its open, he said with no expression

Jax stuck his head inside preparing himself to be the one that would interrupting the now inseparable two

Hey! Wheres Alexis

Ned turned his face to Jax and he immediately understood

What happened?

Shes gone again

What do you mean shes gone?

She got up the other morning left me a good-bye note begging for her usual forgiveness and she took Isabella and went back to her little seaside paradise

With no more explanation?

The night before she seemed distant but she just said she was tired and she went to sleep next thing I know I wake up to an emptyhouse



Jax had an explanation but it wasnt his place to tell

Maybe she had a good reason, maybe something freaked her out

Me? Ned questioned

No not you. You know how she is. Things will make her crazy

Jax if you dont mind Im not really up for

No I understand. Look Im sorry

Ned let out a troubled laugh

Jax stood up and walked towards the door

Ned you know she loves you

Ned only shook his head in disbelief

Jax closed the door behind him