Chapter Eleven

Isabella cried ferociously every night before bed

So did Alexis

It had been days

He hadnt called

She hadnt either

Her life there by the ocean, her invented life of peace and normalcy was now a reminder of alone

Loneliness was a vicious disease

He was standing on her doorstep in his suit

As if he were ready for business

Jax had always been the valiant rescuer and the problem solver

He knew his purpose

He knew if Neds heart was breaking, hers was too

And if he ever had say so her heart would never break

Alexis knew why he was standing there

If you didnt think I was crazy before, she said letting out an obvious troubled laugh

So you just walked out. Just like that, no real good reasons. You didnt even tell him about Sonny seeing Isabella... I assume thats why you left

Yes, Jax had a mission

He had made his way inside

Jax do you know how much I have complicated his life? Do you know from the day we met I have done nothing but turn his life completely upside down.

Love will do that

Love? Its not love when you mix him up with the Cassadines and Sonny Corinthos. Its not love when you swear you love him and then you leave him, repeatedly

So you mean to tell me from the day you met Ned you werent meant to love him? You tried to protect him from everything in your life Alexis! And my God you would do anything if he was Isabellas father that isnt love?

Tears fell down her face

Alexis Jax said sympathetically

She wiped away the tears quickly

No, no, I should be stronger than this

Alexis you dont have to be that strong not all the time

She looked at him

Her eyes began to pierce through him

I wasnt suppose to be a mother. I wasnt suppose to know how it feels to love someone and want to protect someone the way I need to love and protect Isabella

I think you were suppose to because this wouldnt hurt as much as it does

I have to do whats best for her Jax

Ned is whats best for her

Alexis stood looking out the window and the hundreds of waves crashing into the other. They almost seemed to be fighting one another. Just as her brain fighting her heart.

Mind over matter

I love him Jax

She didnt mean to blurt that out so uncautiously

I know

Ive hurt him again. I let him in and then I pushed him away. How many times can he forgive me?

Say I love you, tell him what a jackass youve been. Tell him youre scared, then tell him you need him and that Isabella needs him.
And then he forgives me again? Then he lives my life comfortably?

Yes

Jax

Alexis he would do that for you

You dont think thats a little selfish on my part?

Youre doing whats best for Isabella

She thought for a moment

Im not, Im not doing whats best for Isabella if I dont go and tell him the truth. If I dont tell him why I push him away

Exactly

Alexis looked at Jax in silence letting the conversation sink in

She had to fight her own battles and she knew Ned was worth fighting for

You can take the jet back to Port Charles

Jax I cant I mean Isabella

Isabella and I will be fine while mommy and daddy make up! She will understand

She let out a deep breath

It was more fear than hesitation

Go now!

He was ordering

Ok

And make him forgive you

Again her nervous laugh

I have to



Chapter Twelve

She wasnt unpredictable

She had begged for forgiveness before, in her own stubborn way

This time would have to be the last time, if she was forgiven

Her bag tucked under the arm of the crisp white shirt. It was tucked neatly into her jeans. It illuminated her tan skin even at winters end.

All of her life, she had learned to fight and defend

She didnt look ready for battle at all, though neatly pressed she was worn

She turned the doorknob to the gatehouse, it was open

She could hear the guitar in the other room

Her bag by the door

Her heart wasnt on her sleeve; her heart was strumming the guitar

Her deep breath, her bold move

She appeared in front of him

Silence, the world stopped turning

Were you wondering if I would have the audacity to show my face here again?

He didnt reply only stared

Can I explain? I mean tell you the truth?

He sat his guitar down

Im listening

The coldness of his voice sent a chill through her. But it was fair enough

When Jax and I were at breakfast the other morning Sonny came in, he saw Isabella I was ok with it. He never thought twice about her, he even asked about you. Everything was fine I wasnt fine. The more I thought about it the more it scared me, the more I thought even after all this time he would put two and two together and he would want to take he from me
She sat on the coffee table in front of him. If she wasnt allowed to be close to him then she had already crossed the line

That night I had a dream about almost getting shot outside of the PCPD and the all I could hear was Isabella cryingI dreamed she was with me

He looked saddened by the weight she carried on her shoulders; by the way it haunted her. It was forgivable.

Ned I got scared. I had learned to live my life and not worry about Sonny and then there I was doing it againI had to get away, I had to take Isabella to the place where I knew I could protect her

That includes being away from me?

Im just really stupid sometimes

Her face was pleading

Do you not believe I love you that much?

I do, I know you do. Thats why Im here, thats why if I have to Ill get down on my knees because I love you that much too

We play games Alexis

Im sorry

I knew why you left was about Isabella, I understand that. But I love you and you need to get it through your big brain that I love Isabella too and that I will do anything to protect her, but if you run before I can at least follow then we have nothing

I cant ask you to drop your life for us

I would

Its not fair

Having the love of my life and my daughter is not fair?

His daughter

I love you, I cant live without you, Isabella needs you, I need you Ned Ive screwed up your life again and again but my God Im begging

Its ok to be scared and its ok to be angry but just say what you need, be honest and then just trust me

Her hands had found his and she was holding on for dear life

I need you to forgive me

Alexis I can do that but you just have to promise me

Ned, I need you to come home with me

Are you sure, are you really sure theres room for me?

Her heart seemed to beat out of control; she needed the right answer

She cries every night before she goes to sleep, she said in desperation

A lump in his throat, him missed his little girl

And I do too

That was her honesty

He pressed his head against her forehead allowing her to lean into him

You could tell me to just walk away for the last time and I will. Mainly because I owe you that, I should owe you enough to let you get away from me

You wont walk out that door this time unless Im with you. You do owe me that

I promised Isabella I wouldnt come back without you, I promised Jax

Jax?

Hes with Isabella

Ned let out a shy grin and shook his head

You know he loves you?

I know. I also know hes not afraid to tell me what a jackass I am

Ned kissed her

Her lips sank into his in relief

She squeezed her eyes tight trying to hold on to that one moment

The moment where she had fought for Ned, she had fought for Isabella and she had fought for herself and won.

She had finally won

Let me pack

She shook her head and he stood up

Ned she said grabbing his attention again Im not turning back ever again, this is it

Finally he said as the dimples appeared on his cheeks



Chapter Thirteen

His arms

Wrapped tightly around her

She seemed to sleep peacefully

His subconscious was still unsure that she wouldnt slip through and be gone again

He had awoken with a million thoughts running through his mind

He sat at the edge of the bed watching her

The moon streaked across her skin and she seemed to shimmer

He was where he belonged, with Alexis, with Isabella

He got up to look in on Isabella

She was sleeping through the night now

Everything in her room that surrounded her seemed so pure, like her.

He watched her

Her breath, the faint strands of hair on her head, her cotton sleeper with little baby ducks

Everything about her was pure and innocent

I missed you so much sweet Isabella

He whispered not wanting to wake her

He had missed her so much. He had become addicted to her smile, her eyes, her little fingertips

Days away from her would almost kill a man

Youll never know and maybe I hope youll never know what your mother has been through and maybe even Ill never know what all shes been through, but she fights for what she knows is right and good and most of all who she loves thats why were here

He sat her lamb in the corner of her crib

I love her and I love you and one day I think she might truly understand how much and shell let me spend the rest of my life with the two of youbut shes independent and shes strong and she likes to do things on her own And did I mention shes a little stubborn?

Ned grinned at the thought of Alexis

Isabella your mommy is extremely beautiful and extremely intelligent and Im almost positive she can do absolutely anything, even be a mommy

Ned walked to the window staring into the complete darkness of the ocean and he continued to ramble the thoughts in his head

She wasnt too sure about being a mommy you know... I can bet though from day one she was sure about you just maybe not what was best for you, but give her a day at the time and she figures it out. Just like everything elseI have to remember to tell you everyday what a great woman she is and I have to tell you everyday how lucky we are that she chose us

He squeezed his eyes tight holding back the tears in his eyes

A love sick fool, who didnt care if he was a fool at all

Isabella I want to give her everythingI think she might already have it all but I

He turned to look at her still sleeping and he gave a quiet shy laugh to himself for seemingly talking to himself

He ran his fingers lightly down her chest feeling her breathe at his fingertips

Will she ever marry me, Isabella?



Chapter Fourteen

The thunder, the wind, the rain

The storm

The electricity was out as far as the eye could see

Darkness

An ocean turned midnight blue

Candlelight, set the mood

Lightning striking thunder roaring, rain beating against the window seals

Making love

She laughed aloud with the crashing thunder

He would make her laugh and even giggle from his kisses in all the right places

He made her happy

The comfort

The comfort of knowing, the comfort of being and doing

The feel of his body

The touch of his fingers

The thrillthe thrill

And a heart

A heart fulfilled, bursting with everything that one man could bring to a woman

Her breath on his skin, her palms kneading into his back

The way he made love to her

Made her shake

Made her shiver

Made her breathe

Short quick breaths that told of a body and mind satisfied

He touched her

Soothing her skin by the tips of his fingers

Another reminder of why she adored him

Her legs wrapped around him, he lay inside of her just to be as close as he could

He watched her face as she bit at her bottom lip

I love you she whispered releasing a grin

I love you

Her sincerity was met

The rain seemed to crash into the windowpanes making the outside darkness view as a kaleidoscope

The weather only made her feel more secure in his arms

Safe from the storm

I cant believe shes sleeping through this Ned said observing that Isabella was still sleeping peacefully

I know, I should check on her

Ned let her out of bed knowing she would have to see Isabella sleeping herself

There she was oblivious to the storm. Her chest rising and falling, her hands clinched to her blanket

Alexis grinned in satisfaction

She ok?

Perfect Alexis said letting her robe drop to the floor as she got back in bed next to him

Ned?

Hmm?

Thank you

For?

For coming home with me. For giving me another chance

It wasnt another chance it was me giving you room to do what you needed to do At first I thought you had left me again and then I thought I know you need me like I need you so Ill give you time

And you knew in time I would come crawling back? She said in an amiable tone

Alexis I love you. I love Isabella. The days we spent apart I fell apart But I was sure if you didnt come back then I was coming to you. I just didnt know if enough time had passed

So its ok that I came back to permanently screw up you life?

Permanently huh?

She had said it, not him

Alexis thought about what she had

The word rolled off of her tongue

Yeah permanently, I know now and trust me I know it took forever, but I realizethat I cant live my life with out you

Silence, rain, the rooftop, echoes

Can we agree on that?

What that I take forever she said facetiously

That we now realize the neither of us can live our lives without the other

We can definitely agree on that, she said now serious

No matter what? he questioned

No matter what

Alexis blew out the out the candles that surrounded the bed and then settled herself into the shell of his still naked body

They lie there in darkness letting the conversation seep into their hearts

Permanently she said re-assuring

And he held her tight



Chapter Fifteen

An ordinary life

She wasnt and ordinary woman, why would she want an ordinary life

She was smart and independent and she had her moments of complete and honest power, why would she be content with being just somebodys mother somebodys wife

She wanted to be his wife. She had almost been his wife

If she had been ordinary, if she had an ordinary life, there would be no Isabella.

Not sure how fate works there could be a chance that they would have a little girl

But her smile wouldnt be the samethe way her tears fell down her cheeks wouldnt be the same

Her eyes, those glorious, angelic deep brown eyes wouldnt - be the same

The summer had found its end and signs of fall tried to blend in to the still warm air

A blue dress

He had chosen a blue dress to match her tanned beach baby skin

She grinned as he tried to brush over the few strands of hair she had

He fastened the small silver necklace around her neck

Then picked her up holding her in front of the mirror

Ok how do we look? Ned asked trying to one handily straighten his tie

Isabella squealed at the sight of herself

Just the reaction I was looking for

Ned heard Alexis walk through the front door

Ned!

Ned and Isabella peered in front of her

Alexis stunned to see a suit and tie and a blue dress

Wow look at the two of you! Do you two have a date?

Not exactly Ned said reaching for her hand

Ned pulled her into the living room.

Pink, orange, purple the sky

The exact time on the wall

The blue in his tie matched Isabellas dress

Remember the moment, remember everything

Alexis was puzzled

Um will you sit?

Honey what is it?

Um will you hold Isabella for a second I forgot something

Ok

She took Isabella in to her arms and Ned disappeared in to the other room

Ned where did you go!

Ill be there in a second!

What is he up to Isabella? Alexis said giving her funny faces to make her giggle

Alexis held her up in the air above her bringing her down for a kiss and the up again to see her grinning face

She was to kiss her again

But the necklace fell from the inside of the neck of her dress and dangled before Alexis

Alexis swallowed hard as she brought Isabella to her lap

Familiar

It was hers
Tears fell rapidly down her cheeks as Isabella glared at the sparkling object around her neck

Alexis unlatched the clasp of the necklace and held it in her hand

Isabella reached for it but before she could take hold of it Ned lifted her into his arms

Ned

He sat down in front of her

Isabella and I have talked this through a thousand times and well we decided you might want your ring back

Alexis clinched it in her fist as her bottom lip quivered

I mean its yours and we both agreed you should have it

Ned I, I

Um sorry could you hold her again?

He placed Isabella in her lap so they could both face him

He got down on one knee before her

Isabella and I also thought that we should he reached into his pocket get you another one if I we were going to do this right

He held the ring in front of her

You are the love of my life, my heart and my soul Alexis Davis and once when I thought we could have it all I now realized we didnt because we were missing our greatest part he leaned in and kissed Isabella on her forehead. There are no words for how it feels to be the person who gets to love both of you, but all I can do is thank you, thank you everyday of my life and hope that you will spend everyone of those days with me

He tried to wipe the tears from her face but he couldnt stop them and even Isabella seemed to reach for her face not understanding why her mommy was crying

Will you marry me?

Alexis leaned in to kiss him taking in the taste of his lips at that one moment, then looked into Neds eyes

Well? Ned asked nervously

Alexis grinned

Yes

Ned seemed to let out a sigh in relief

As soon as possible

What?

I want to marry you as soon as possibleif thats ok?

Ned laughed right out loud then kissed her

My God I love you